*Sigh*
...the world's pretty fucked up right now, huh?
Since both of my jobs involve exhaustive research and writing, I feel like writing has been less of an outlet for me lately...it's felt more like a chore. Or at least, this blog has.
I want to write consistently; as an independent professional, that's important. Even if I write nothing but goofy shit like this, with goofy shit like the picture above as my accompanying visual media, it's important that I don't stop. The most important thing for a writer to do is write...wait for it...consistently.
Lately I've been wondering if I should try writing a book. The same amount of writing this blog takes, I've been thinking about applying that same level of effort to outlining, writing, and editing a novel. Maybe a thousand or so words a week. I'm not exactly in a rush - if I went through with it, it would be for me, so I can choose my own deadline.
I've always wanted to write a novel. The irony is I'm not a big reader...I read slowly and my mind wanders easily, so I often have to re-read the same passages multiple times. It takes me a month to read what some people could tackle in a week. Nonetheless, it's always been an interest of mine. Writing and publishing a book is practically a prerequisite for people taking you seriously as a writer.
Fun fact, I've actually written a novel before. It's just that it was garbage because I was in high school and it was barely 55,000 words, and also I did it as a school project during my senior year. So I will not be publishing that, on my blog or otherwise.
I have a couple ideas floating around my head...the problem is I get discouraged easily when it comes to both reading and writing; if I'm not making visible progress, I feel like I'm wasting my time.
That, and life has been particularly difficult for...well, actually for the past 5 years of my life, but the last 3 have been especially hard. The current regime's constant violation of human rights and economic fuck-ups, not to mention jaw-dropping diplomatic incompetence, or the horrifying swelling of eugenicist and/or fascist sympathy among my fellow citizens...has not helped my mood. That, and I'm currently digging myself out of a pretty steep hole of debt that I got into despite being very careful - almost miserly - with money for years and working full-time. The recession has really fucked with my life goals and outlook.
I'm working hard to stay positive. My "sobriety experiment" earlier this year was one example of such efforts. I've been trying extra hard to allow myself plenty of "me" time to make sure my mental health remains strong. Still, I've been through a lot since I graduated college 5 years ago. Like, more than a lot. And I haven't really had much of a break - it's been one extremely difficult situation after another. Currently, it's dealing with a long commute and a gigantic pile of debt, a car that won't stop generating additional expenses each month with tons of minor and major repairs, and a few other things I'm not going to get into here.
I'm not sure what I'm going to do about this blog - I skipped the week of the 4th of July as a way to give myself a little break, but then I had to skip the next week as well due to the aforementioned need to maintain my mental health, given certain developments in my personal life that week. Sorry to keep being so cryptic, I just really don't want to share too much about it in a space as public as this.
Anyway.
If you regularly read this blog, don't be shocked if I start posting less - if that's what goes down, it'll probably be because I'm busy working on other creative projects, or taking care of myself, which is something I've always been bad at.
Also, credit to johnLenonnade for the, uh...unique art that I for some reason decided to use as a header for my blog. You can check out his work here.
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